Archive for the ‘General BS’ Category

IPG Execs say “FUCK YOU” to recession and shareholders alike

Today AdWeek reports that IPG Execs enjoyed a 2008 pay hike of substantional amounts.

Interpublic Group CEO Michael Roth (pictured) received $10.84 million in compensation in 2008, including a 17.7 percent hike in his base salary to $1.3 million.

Roth’s total compensation, which includes stock, bonus and perquisites, rose 21 percent over the previous year, according to information in IPG’s newly filed proxy for the company’s annual meeting.

The second-highest paid executive at the company is John Dooner, CEO of McCann Worldgroup (and former IPG CEO), who was given $5.21 million in total compensation, including a base salary of $1.28 million, unchanged from 2007. In the year-earlier period, Dooner received $5.87 million in compensation.

The comments sure are fiery and rightfully so.  My question to them is will they do anything about it?  Sure execs ripping off the shareholders is nothing new, but in this economy it tends to sting more than usual.

IPG says “FUCK YOU BITCHES! WE’RE RICH!”

chappelle_james

Dominos, one more reason NOT to eat it!

As if you needed another reason NOT to eat the crap in a box (no not this crapinabox) we call Dominos pizza here’s more:

AdAge and other media outlets are reporting on this huge fiascco involving Dominos employee’s seen in a video posted to YouTube of them doing some really disgusting things to an “unfortunate” customers’ pizza.  Apparently due to some great online sleuthing, said employee’s have now been fired.  Read all about it:

AdAge Article

BS’er of the Year: Peter Arnell

Yes it’s that time again.  Agency BS is proud to present this years bullshitter of the Year…

PETER ARNELL!

1292-peter-arnell

So various media outlet’s report that Peter Arnell, founder and chief creative officer of Arnell Group, a PR firm that’s a wholly owned subsidiary of PR megacorp Omnicom, has once again showed the world that he’s a goochtwad, and seriously needs to retire.  FOREVER.  Nevermind that he was voted as one of the worst bosses ever, and royally fucked up the Pepsi brand (regardless of the “brilliant” write up justifying it), now he’s done it with Tropicana. This guy is one crazy mofo and certainly a piece of work.  He belongs more in an insane asylum than making millions off of other people’s hard work.

tropicana-rebrand

According to Information Resources Inc., unit sales dro

pped 20%, while dollar sales decreased 19%, or roughly $33 million, to $137 million between Jan. 1 and Feb. 22. Moreover, several of Tropicana’s competitors appear to have benefited from the misstep, notably Minute Maid, Florida’s Natural and Tree Ripe. Varieties within each of those brands posted double-digit unit sales increases during the period. Private-label products also saw an increase during the period, in keeping with broader trends in the food and beverage space.

You can watch his own words on defending the Tropicana rebrand but he clearly stumbles and doesn’t have anything really concrete to say. Anyone can tell that the other branding was much more effective, it stands out on the shelves, and you can see if it’s NO PULP (i always hated pulp)  right there front and center. This guy is the poster boy for FAILURE and BS.

Simpsons Mock Apple

Ahhh yes, it’s been a long time coming…they devoted significant “Simpsons MOCK time” for this too! Weeeee!  Even as a fellow Apple fan, i thought this was pretty hilarious – and you know good ole Stevie did too!

TV Ads Get Boring?

You KNOW it’s getting bad when the gooch twads over at AdAge start bitching about the TV commercials.  They’re running a front page article about how redundant and blatent the TV commercials have gotten in terms of recycling old campaigns and running the same ads over and over.

Part of it is of course intentional.  The whole “any press is good press” schtick.  Meaning even if you piss off everyone or in the case of the Toyota “Zero Spot” campaign where people made a Facebook group petitioning AGAINST the TV ad…it’s still getting people talking about the ad.  In some twisted logic, it kinda makes sense.  On the other hand if you piss off everyone, they are just that less likely to pay attention to the next ad, it’s a double edged sword.

The other thing mentioned was that we should (and we are) seeing the trends of TV ads being bought for entire runs of shows.  The “Superbowl” model.  An interesting trend, i think as far as reaching a specific demographic this might bring more results – and campaigns could be targeted and created for that demographic.  Media buyers take notice because the standard model for media buys will have to change.  Don’t get caught with your pants down.  Of course they will need to innovate more than in the past.  If creatives can speak up and have the balls to go for more than the norm, maybe the suits will be more receptive.

Agency BS coins the word: GOOCH TWAD!

So a few days ago we batted around the idea to have our own unique word.  We had a few good ideas but with a sudden flash of creativity (oh you know it!) we came up with a new word that offers that subtle but gross jab at the psyche.  Without further ado we Agency BS coins:

GOOCH TWAD!

If you don’t know what a “gooch” is – Google is your friend.

P.S.  Why the FUCK doesn’t this thing have a text size option?

Happy Turkey Day

For those in the US, give thanks for whatever you got and pray you still have it later.  I’m not a big turkey guy myself (meat tends to be a bit dry) but i will say a few cold slices of dark meat on a couple slabs of bread with some mayo, pickle, lettuce, tomato, and dijon mustard sounds great.  But yea, plenty of stuffing, mash potatoes and gravvy for me!

GET YER TURKEY ON GOOCH TWADS!

thanksgiving_turkey

Agency BS Coins the word…..?

George Parker over at the rank but delicious blog, AdScam, is known for his “douchenozzle” word.  I think it’s about time we got some of that action.  So what do you think?  We put our creative minds together and came up with our favorites:

Sound off bitches!

  • donkeypunch
  • jizzface
  • fucktard
  • monkeyballs
  • fuckface

Woods Splits with GM

woods_gm1

All the media outlets are reporting that Tiger Woods has ended his his five-year, $40 million deal with GM.  While they say it has NOTHING to do with GM (and all US automakers) woes in this horrible US economy, we all know that’s a pile of stinky horse shit.  Regardless, it’s a smart move by Wood’s people, and now that I think about it – he has some really smart people working for him.  It’s not like he needs the money either, the GM deal was only a part of his $100 million in annual endorsement deals with Nike, EA Sports, American Express and Tag Heuer, among others.

It’s not likely he will fill his endorsement portfolio with another car company any time soon, Mr. Carter said. “There’s no urgency there,” Mr. Carter said. “To quickly realign with another automotive [marketer] doesn’t help his brand that much. It makes it look like he needs the money — which he doesn’t — or he wants to maintain a relationship with the industry itself, and at this point in time that’s not a priority with either side.”

I totally agree!  This Carter guy must have some ad chops because he’s totally right.  Any other car deal at this point would damage Tiger’s brand, and it’s not like he needs the money either.  Good stuff as usual Tiger, now if only EA could put out a better game for you.